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Wednesday, January 28, 2015

First and Best

My house is quiet. Everyone is in bed (even me). Usually before going to bed a read today's verse from this Bible app I have in my phone... And today it says:

"So letting your sinful nature control your mind leads to death. But letting the Spirit control your mind leads to life and peace. For the sinful nature is always hostile to God. It never did obey God’s laws, and it never will. That’s why those who are still under the control of their sinful nature can never please God." (Romans 8:6-8 NLT)

The girls and I have really been talking about how we can give our first and best to God in everything we do in our everyday lives. This first and best conversation came from a devotional we started doing this week that focuses on the people who are in the Hall of Faith (Hebrews 11). This week we learned about Abel and how he gave his first and best lamb as an offering to God and how his brother Cain gave some crops as his offering. God was not pleased by Cain's offering because it was not from the heart and it wasn't the best he could give to the Lord. This lesson has really made me ponder, think on, and truly ask for forgiveness for the many ways I do not give God my first and best. He deserves nothing less than my full self to completely be His. I truly do not want this life without Him... But I have not been living the way I truly desire Him and His closeness. 

Tonight I lay here in bed thinking about my first and best for God and if I even accomplished giving Him an inkling of what He deserves... Probably not.

But the verse I shared above says it all... Letting the Spirit control my mind will bring Him closer. I can truly tell you He is closer. I have been struggling with this weird anxious feeling for a couple of months... Going off on my family and letting this horrible anger lash out like a whip. The tongue is truly the sharpest and deadliest weapon. But this past week I have had much relief... My focus has been more on My Protector and Life Giver than my anxiety. He has filled me with peace and the Spirit is ever more evident and I am truly humbled in thanksgiving. There is nothing worse than living through our sinful nature... It doesn't make you or anyone else feel good or produce any fruit. The feeling is unwanted! But it seems when I get to my lowest point He is always there waiting to take my hand and wrap me in His love.

How are you giving you first and your best to God? He desires our best and deserves so much more.

Good night

Friday, January 2, 2015

Happy 2015!!!

Happy New Year!! A new year with a clean slate! Isn't that funny how it really does feel new?? Like no one remembers the old, but we are all living in the new year with new goals. We can all restart with better in our hearts. 

2014 has been sweet to my family. I had the privilege to travel to India twice and I was taught some hard things... Things I am still trying to grasp. My girls finished a school year, Hailee 2nd grade and Heidi Kindergarten... And then a new school year began, Hailee 3rd grade and Heidi 1st grade. We had a beautiful experience in Disney World last summer for 6 days... It was awesome and we plan on returning! I began running in the Spring of last year and have come to love that quietness between me and the road. A lot of praying has happened while I pound the pavement and there is nothing I can do, so I might as well make that time count and it has been precious to me. I ran my first 5K in May and did awesome! Then just recently my family and I prayed and decided to leave our home church of 8 years to take a leap of faith and new adventure with a Pastor, who will be planting a church called The Church at Cane Island. The pastor leading this new adventure is a man I respect and see as a life changer, someone who really sees the nations that are here in Katy and ready to bring a revival to many hearts. He is a man who is real, authentic, an evangelist, and I believe the Lord has great things planned for him and his congregation. Many are going to put their faith in the Lord, because of the willingness of this man to say "Yes." and to walk out on the water. I know our family is in for a life changing experience! Again, 2014 has been sweet! And I am excited about 2015! 

This year I have goals or resolutions (which ever you choose to use... They really mean the same thing to me)... My first one is using people's names when I see them. For instance saying "Hi, Brenda!" instead of my normal "Hey." I am always caught of guard when people come up to me and say "Hi" first... It's like they are surprising me and then I am frozen and can't get their name out. Not that I can't remember your name, but I always feel awkward. But names are important... I know when someone greets me using my name it makes me feel good... So that is what I am going to work very hard on. 

My second goal/resolution is being a Mary. Sitting at Jesus' feet, pressing into him, and not letting the busyness of life distract me away from the One I need more. Truthfully I am better with Him and I cannot function well without Him. It really is sad when I try... I am like a fish taken out of water and placed on the ground to flop and thrash around when I am not near Him. Let me tell you it doesn't feel good.

I will not be a Martha anymore! "Her sister, sat at the Lord's feet, listening to what he taught. But Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing. She came to Jesus and said, "Lord, doesn't it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work? Tell her to come and help me." But the Lord said to her, "My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her." Luke 10: 39-42

I know as I seek Him more every other detail of my life will fall into place. I know as I seek Him more I will love BIGGER! Not just the worldly "love" so many try to accomplish on their own, but the kind of Love I don't even know about yet... I type of Love (compassion) I haven't put my guard down enough to even experience.

Cheers, my dear friends! Seek Him and if you haven't found Him keep knocking... The door will be opened.