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Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Psalm 130: Waiting for the Redemption of the Lord

I love chapters in the Bible that complete sum it up. The ones that get right down to the point... I am not one that likes to beat around the bush. So, when I see straight forwardness I get excited. :o)

"Out of the depths I have cried to You, O Lord;
Lord, hear my voice!
Let Your ears be attentive
To the voice of my supplications.

If You, Lord, should mark inquities,
O Lord, who could stand?
But there is forgiveness with You,
That You may be feared.

I wait for the Lord, my soul waits,
And in His word I do hope.
My soul waits for the Lord
More than those who watch for the morning--
Yes, more than those who watch for the morning.

O Israel, hope in the Lord;
For with the Lord there is mercy,
And with Him is abundant redemption.
And He shall redeem Israel
From all his iniquities." Psalm 130

Monday, January 24, 2011

Set Back or Step Forward

If you don't know... Bob and I are putting our house up for sale TOMORROW!!! We are very excited and anxious. :o) This is something we have been wanting to do for about a year now. Things are moving along nicely and as things move along smoothly I have this constant peace that this is God's will. I have had my hopes set on moving to the country onto some land in a big house. I found this house on the MLS listings in Houston and instantly fell in love. We did go and see it and came to the conclusion it was going to need a lot of work. I am the type of person who sees the brighter side of things and see potential. All I can say is I saw potential in this fixer upper. Bob... well not so much. He said he liked the house, but it was set up funny and there were these corky things about the house. I agreed with him, but still loved it. I continued to pray about this house and I think I was really praying that this was the house for us and praying that God would bless us with this house. Bob and I continued to talk about this house and we never really got anywhere because 1. I loved the house and 2. He didn't love the house. So, today while I was cleaning floors I was praying... I prayed that whatever He has for us I would follow. I meant it and I gave it to God no matter what the outcome. Well, Bob came home tonight and he told me when the kids went to bed he wanted to talk about the Falcon house (the house I loved). The kids went to bed and we talked... Bob had another plan... move out of this house into another home that we could sale in 3 years and make some money off. In the mean time we will save save save and be able to get more land, barn, and better house in a few years. I really REALLY didn't want to give up my dream... but I knew this was God. I feel peaceful.

Now, we are looking at houses that weren't even part of our plan, but there are some very beautiful houses out there. I am very excited to see the house the Lord has all picked out for us.

I am so amazed how God has changed my heart and my life. I love how He is moving and molding me into what He wants and that I am bending at ease for Him. I love my wonderful God!

Friday, January 21, 2011

All rolled up in one

I am not perfect by any means but I do try to do my best and follow the Lord's law. I read Psalm 119 and all that I feel and I all I see changing... was all put in this one chapter.

"Let my cry come before You, O Lord;
Give me understanding according to Your word.
Let my supplication come before You;
Deliver me according to Your word.
My lips shall utter praise,
For You teach me Your statutes.
My tongue shall speak of Your word,
For all Your commandments as righteousness.
Let Your hand become my help,
For I have chosen Your precepts.
I long for Your salvation, O Lord,
And Your law is my delight.
Let my soul live, and it shall praise You;
And let Your judgments help me.
I have gone astray like a lost sheep;
Seek Your servant,
For I do not forget Your commandments." Pslam 119:169-176

I have struggles like anyone else, but I know where to go for strength, forgiveness, and mercy... my Lord, Jesus Christ.

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Deuteronomy 1-12

WOW!! I read 12 chapters of Deuteronomy yesterday and today and was at awe. I was puzzled, saddened, over joyed, and anxious while reading these chapters. So many good things said and good happened through out these chapters. I am so ready to go see this holy land I can barely contain myself. All I want to do is talk about it, pray about it, read about it, and think about it.

I am sad for Moses who was not allowed to cross the Jordan River to go into the holy land. I believe he was not allowed to go because of all the chosen peoples bad decisions they made along the way (the 40 years through the wilderness), but he was told by the Lord to encourage and strength Joshua up before the went into Israel (Deut. 3:28). That must have been so hard for Moses because he pleaded with God to let Him in but the Lord wouldn't have it.

Moses did as he was told and he reviewed the 10 commandments with all who would be going to the holy land. "Therefore you shall be careful to do as the Lord your God has commanded you; you shall not turn aside to the right hand or left. You shall walk in all the ways which the Lord your God has commanded you, that you may live and that it may be well with you, and that you may prolong your days in the land which you shall posses." Deut. 5:32,33.

I don't know how the chosen people could forget all they saw with their own eyes and heard with their own ears... but they were continually reminded to remember those things and "teach them to your children, speak of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up." (Deut. 11:19) They were told to "fear the Lord your God, to walk in all His ways and to love Him, to serve the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul..." Deut. 10:12.

There was one verse that really popped out at me: "He is your praise, and He is your God, who has done for you there great and awesome things which your eyes have seen. Your fathers went down to Egypt with seventy persons, and now the Lord your God has made you as the stars or heaven in multitude." Deut. 10:21,22

So beautiful and so true. He is so beautiful and His Word is so true.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Preparation

I know I keep saying this, but the Lord is preparing me. For what? I am not totally sure. I do feel like I am being prepared for Israel. I have read through a few chapters of Numbers and today a few chapters of Deuteronomy and I wasn't completely lost in it all. It began to sink in... soaking in the knowledge of what I will see. I also, feel like the Lord is preparing my heart for this journey. Feeling compassion for people even when they may not deserve it. I feel like everything is coming together just as God wants it to.

We are going to be putting our house on the market in a couple of weeks and I feel total peace. I have been praying that if this isn't what He wants us to be doing right now for Him to close the doors, but instead He has graciously opened them. The Lord has put people in our path to help us. Helping us in ways we never would have expected... I give the Lord all the thanks because really it is all Him.

I have been feeling distant from some people lately but I think it is more preparation for what the Lord has for us. I don't know why, but I do know in the end it will be so wonderful because it is part of His perfect plan.

I can't describe this feeling of being prepared for something, but it feels good to know God is working inside of me. Today when I was reading Deuteronomy one verse was thrown out at me... "For the Lord your God has blessed you in all the work of your hands. He knows your trudging through the great wilderness. These forty years the Lord your God has been with you; you have lacked nothing." Deuteronomy 2:7

Thursday, January 6, 2011

New

I decided it was time to update my blog. I loved the heading of my blog before, but the kids have grown, I have changed (spiritually and physically), and Bob... well he is the same. :o) It was just time for an update. These pictures were taken by my friend, Lyndsay. They are our yearly family pictures we get every fall. Isn't Lyndsay good at what she does? :o)

I have grown so much... in ways I could never explain. Only God knows how my heart and inward thoughts have changed and that is really all that matters. I feel so good on where my life is going and how the family is closer than ever.

God is spilling out everywhere showing me things I need to fix and change, but I totally see the goodness out of it even though it is so hard to do. Change is so hard. He is teaching me how to just go with the flow and to let go. God is already in control before it even happens. He is preparing me for new things to come... I just know it. And it is all unknown, but I have total piece about it because I am going with the flow. :o)

I hope you enjoy my new look.

Monday, January 3, 2011

Frazzled.

I am a tad frazzled. Most of the frazzled feeling is from change. I was just informed that Brian Haynes (pastor that just left Kingsland to pastor another church) canceled the trip to Israel I was planning on going on. You maybe thinking... whats next?? Well, there are other trips. There is another Israel trip leaving March 23 with a man a met about a month ago... he taught Brian Haynes and got him on board with being a guide for these trips. He is a great man. Then there is another trip leaving March 29 traveling to Egypt, Jordan, and Israel. This trip maybe a little harder for me to go on because it costs more and a few other flight issues. It is looking like I will be going on the trip with Marty to Israel (plus, it is a little cheaper).

Back to why I feel frazzled. I have a really hard time with change. Yes, I will still be going to Israel but everything else has changed. I will be flying out of Houston to Chicago where I will meet up with the rest of the group flying to Israel. Then I will be traveling with a new guide/rabbi. I will be traveling with a group that I don't know to a country I really don't know... with different dates. I guess I just felt comfortable going to Israel because Brian Haynes was leading it. But, I will have to tell you... I feel like this is all God's plan. That He has been working this all out from the beginning. I have confidence in that... but the change brings in fear.

I have been having a little bit of fear lately. Fear of travel... completely around the world by myself. Yes, I will be with a group and I feel safe with that, but Bob won't be with me. I won't be where I feel secure. I know this fear is not from God and I know this trip is His plan. I feel like this trip is a promise He has made to me. A promise that I will grow closer to Him in a way I never thought I would.

Last year in April or May I wrote I felt God doing some radical things inside of me and one of those things was this Israel trip. I felt the tingle inside but, always thought it was untouchable, but now I see God's hand in it all. I have lost 30 lbs. and more to lose by the trip, but I know it wasn't all me... it was God giving me the push. And I believe meeting Marty (the new guide) and having dinner with him was a coincident... it was all God!

I am sorry if this sounds like a lot of complaining, but this is one of my biggest struggles... change. I get a bit angry and shaky when change arises, but I will have to say I feel better now after remember God's promise to me and His faithfulness.

"Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart,
All you who hope in the Lord."
Psalm 31:24