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Sunday, May 9, 2010

Forgiveness

Have you ever received a complete real forgiveness from someone you truly hurt? The kind of hurt that hurts you so deeply?

I hurt a very close friend. I hurt her so bad that it probably brought back bad memories from her younger years. I had no clue I hurt her. I had no clue I went to far. I am so thankful she emailed me right away to let me know her feelings and how horrible I made her feel. When I read that email it broke my heart. It broke my heart because someone I care about so much... someone I consider a sister... I hurt. I said words that were hurtful and hateful to her. I felt horrible and so very sorry for the words that came out of my mouth.

How could I do that? I could I be mean to someone I love so dearly?

It brought up memories from Elementary school when I was teased about my nose. These 2 boys teased me on the bus and said I had a nose like a Smurf. It hurt my feeling so bad... and it hurt that other kids on the bus were hearing this and that they may think the same thing and start to tease me. After my friend emailed me and told me how I hurt her... I started to think about the teasing I went through in my younger years and if I was teased about my nose now... that it would bring all those hurtful feelings back.

I emailed my friend this morning, but didn't know if she would get it this morning. I knew were she would be this morning at church, so I went and apologized to her and told her how sorry I was and I asked for her forgiveness. I so did not deserve her forgiveness... but she gave it to me. She forgave me for my horrible mean words. She loves me enough to forgive me and carry on our friendship.

It is so amazing how when you have a relationship with the Lord and accept the Holy Spirit to dwell inside of you... how you begin to show traits of humbleness and the characteristics of Jesus. She didn't have to forgive me, but she loved me and has experienced the forgiveness from her Father... she knows how that feels and humbled herself enough to forgive me. Someone who she thought would never say these hurtful words... she forgave. And I so love her for that.

3 comments:

joven said...

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Christi Brown said...

unfortunately or fortunately (however you want to look at it) I too went through the same thing last week!

debgraafsma said...

What a great blog!! I love your honesty also - very refreshing. Thanks for your insights.. Blessings, Debbye
debgraafsma.blogspot.com