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Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Pondering on a few things

I love to ponder on things :o)... what woman doesn't right? I like to ponder on the bible and how I fit in... for example how many things I do that God grieves on and the things I do to try to bring Him glory. I really ponder on the things that bring Him glory and things that bring Him praise. I love that feeling I get when I go outside my "bubble" and do God's work here on this earth. You know things that he calls us to do... and when I actually do it I think "Man... that was awesome! I am going to do that more often." Then when an opportunity comes up again to step out of my "bubble" and I actually think about that feeling I had and what the Lord is calling me to do... and then... I don't do it! Guess what I ponder on then... you are right... I think what a let down I am and WHY THE HECK DID I NOT TAKE THAT AMAZING OPPORTUNITY!" I don't know...

I also have been pondering on the storms that God puts in our path. It amazes me when I think back about someone else's storms or my own and think about like 10 years ago how these storms where not even a thought in our mind. I think about how carefree we were 10 years ago and never EVER thought anything like cancer or death would even be in our cards. I remember back in high school when I would be out in the sun all day and not wear one little ounce of sun screen and get so sun burned. It just never crossed my mind. Then I would go to school after a sunny fun weekend and people (teachers) would tell me "Sterling, you should wear sun screen you are going to get skin cancer." I would just shrug it off and would think something like that would NEVER happen to me. Well... look... I got skin cancer and one of the worst. But you know what... going through this storm has been one of the best and most wonderful things ever happen to me. I have this new look on life... I have this new look on God... I have this new look on the word of God... I have this new look on relationships I have with family and friends... I hate to say this, but I look forward to more storms. I may not like what is thrown my way, but I know I will grow closer to God through it and lean on Him like He wants.

These are just a few things I have been pondering on...

Tomorrow I go to MD Anderson for my first check up since my surgery in August 2009. I will post more after tomorrow :o).

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