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Saturday, April 25, 2009

What I miss..

I know a lot of you know that I use to own a horse and use to ride but, I had to put Covers' (my horse) down on September 10, 2005. It literally broke my heart. I was a good horse owner. I did everything in my power to do the best I could for Covers. When he got hurt I got out there as soon as possile (not knowing how bad it actually was). I was on the phone with the vet immediately! Money wasn't even a thought until of course I saw how bad he was. After the vet stitched him up I still had a lot I had to do to care for him. I was going to have to go out at least once a day (I tried to go out once a day but, some days it wasn't possible) and clean out his wounds and wrap both hind legs up daily.

Hailee wasn't even a year yet and she would just go a long with me. Most of the time she was happy and would just sit in her stroller until I was done (of course watching everything I did).

After about a week Covers' legs and his other injuries were healing nicely but, he started to get a hematoma (who knows if I am even spelling that right?) on the left side of his trunk. I was told by the vet not to really worry about it but, I needed to lounge him to kind of work it out and to spray pressured water on it. I did exactly what the vet told me to do. I just added that onto my daily list.

I continued doing this for a couple of days and then Covers started to colic (colic is kind of like a stomach ache for a horse but sometimes it can get really bad and the horses intestines can twist and get tangled up and then there are major problems). I didn't just show up one day and he was laying down but, it was just a normal day. I went out there did all I was suppossed to do and then when I was leaving I took his halter off so he could go do his thing and he went and laid down. He never did that. I went and tried to get him up but, nothing seemed to work. Then he started to grown and look at his stomach (that is not a good sign). So, I got him up and had to walk him around (when a horse starts to colic that is the best thing you can do is just walk them around). Bob was on his way to come get Hailee as I was waiting for the vet.

This went on for a couple of days until it went more down hill (the vet came out 2 more times). We had to get him to the Equine Hospital in Katy. I had to call a friend of a friend to borrow a horse trailer. Finally I got Covers to the hospital and then had to wait for the vet to get there. I walked him around the Equine Hospital for probably about 2 hours. Covers ended up staying a couple of night there. I came everyday to see him. The last day he was there he looked a lot better. He was out in a little paddock eating grass and I was thinking things were looking up. Until later that night I got a call and things were turning for the worse. I was told we needed to get him to a Equine hospital of 290 as soon as we could. The vet was saying they could do more for him there then they could do. So, we got a hold of the people we borrowed the trailer from before and we went and got it to go take Covers to the new Equine Hospital.

I was hoping on the way to the new Equine Hospital that Covers would get better (sometimes if a horse is colicing and you put them in a trailer and take them for a little ride their intestines will get jiggled around enough to where they are better) but, that didn't happen for Covers. We got Covers to the new Equine Hospital really late that night and the vet was there waiting for us. The vet took Covers and put him in a stall. He said he was going to sedate Covers to take away from some of his pain. And that was that for that night. I felt horrible about just leaving him there.

My mom was in town like a day before we took Covers to this new hospital so, she could stay home with Hailee. I really believe that my mom being here was totally God.

So, the next day I was on my to the Equine Hospital (it was a little before 9:00 a.m.) and as I was on my way the vet called me to let me know about Covers. He wasn't doing better. We talked about surgery and he (the vet) told me with Covers' age (he was 23 yrs old) and how much he had been sedated these past few days that Covers probably wouldn't make it through surgery.

This just broke my heart. Covers and I have been together since I was 14 yrs old. I had owned him since I was 16 yrs old. I loved this horse so much. He was once a race horse, had lots of owners, and was CRAZY when I met him. I rehabilited him. I was the only one that he let ride him (he was a crazy man when anyone else try to ride him). We had a bound that I will never be able to explain. I loved him so much!

I got to the Equine Hospital and I new what was going to have to be done but, I couldn't. We had no money to pay for the surgery. I tried to call my dad to see if he could loan us the money but, he didn't answer and I left a message on his cell phone but, he never returned my call until later. I knew even if we did the surgery he more than likely wouldn't make it. I cried and cried. Finally I went back and saw Covers. I said my goodbyes, I petted him, I hugged him, my eyes poured with tears, I kissed him I don't know how many times, I took in that smell I loved so much about horses, and I told him I loved him and that he was the best horse I could ever ask for. There was a guy in there with me and he asked me if I wanted the hair from his tail and I said yes. I will never forget that man... he said he was sorry and he cried with me. There is something about horses and something about the love they give people that is unexplainable.

The vet came in and he asked if I was ready. I said yes. I had to leave while they put Covers down. I really didn't want to go but, he (the vet) said it was best because Covers would twitch and sometimes the horses thrash. I went and waited in the waiting room. It was like 15 minutes later and they took me to him. He was outside laying on the ground with his face covered witha cloth. It broke my heart. I cried and cried and cried.....

I ended up leaving him (I was really thinking about taking his body to bury where I could visit him but it was going to be a lot of work and I didn't think I was up for it). On my way home I had tears filling up my eyes. I cried and cried all the way home. I couldn't stop the tears if I tried. When I got home I went to bed and cried my eyes out. It is still hard to think about. Even as I wrote this blog I cried. I really miss Covers...

I tried to list things I miss but, can't think of them all. I miss everything about a horse. I miss riding them. I think that I won't remember how to ride but, I think it will be like riding a bike. I miss caring for them. I loved feeding Covers, grooming him, rinsing him off, watching him run like a crazy man and even cleaning up after him. He was a great horse. I don't know if I will ever find one like him again

One day I will own another one and I will have everything I miss so much.

1 comment:

TAMI said...

I cried when I read about Covers. I also have felt that me being there at that time was God's work. I feel blessed that I was there during this time.
I love you.